Blessed beyond measure

For those of you that know me, you know that several years ago God asked me to stretch way beyond my comfort zone when my principal at the time asked me to teach 5th grade.  Reluctantly, I agreed.  For two years, I taught 5th grade alongside one of my very best friends.  Those years brought many challenges and many blessings.  I had the privilege of teaching students that I had previously taught in second grade.  I also had the honor of teaching new students.  Combined, the students of those two years brought much joy into my life, amid the stresses of wanting to give them all that they needed and often unable to give or get them what they needed most.  At the end of the second year in fifth grade, I asked to be moved back to a primary grade and taught second grade the last two years.

When we first taught 5th grade together!

 



Fast forward two full years...

In the spring of this year, God again asked me to move out of my comfort zone and pursue a new teaching position in a new district.  (This is big for me because CHANGE isn't something that I easily meet with acceptance.)  Striving to be obedient, I applied for several jobs within that district, including second grade, third grade, and fourth/fifth split grade.  I was called for an interview.  When the principal called to offer the job to me, you guessed it...it was for the fourth/fifth grade position.  Again, striving to be obedient, I accepted the position and prayed that God would give me exactly what I needed to be able to reach my new students.

Since that night, He has been answering that plea over and over in so many ways that I probably can't even remember them all.  First, that same evening that I got the call, my friend (the one that I had taught 5th grade with before) called and said that she had just been told that she would be teaching 4th/5th in her school.  WOW!  God cares so much for both of us that he placed us in the same grade so that we could spur each other on even though we are in different schools in different districts.  What a blessing it has been to chat, plan, share ideas, and pray for each other as we embark on this latest adventure in God's plans for our lives!  Second, He placed me at a school where the principal obviously loves her students and her teachers and does all she can to support both groups!  At the same time, He gave me two wonderful young ladies to work with on my new team.  They have been more than helpful, they've been a life-line!  Finally, over the last few weeks God has poured out His love on me by confirming the "whys" of placing me with this age.  From reconnecting with one of those former fifth graders that is now starting fresh as a freshman in high school to running into a student I had in second and fifth grades at Wal-Mart to being able to cheer for three of my former babies for their performance in a major musical, peace and a renewed excitement for teaching has flooded my soul.  To top it all off, within minutes of my twenty-eight students walking through our classroom door, I fell head over heals for each of them.  They have a zeal for learning that is contagious.  In just three short days, bonds have been built and our classroom family has formed.

 

So while there has certainly been stressful moments (like...my little orange flash drive that held nearly all my school files of the last 5 years is lost...AGAIN!), saying YES! to God has produced a peace that can't be explained in human terms. 

My cup overflows as God continues to bless me beyond measure!

Luke 6:38  Give, and it will be given to you. They will pour into your lap a good measure—pressed down, shaken together, and running over. For by your standard of measure it will be measured to you in return.”

Blessings,
Cindy

How forgetful we are!

So I'm sure you've heard it said that elephants never forget!  People on the other hand are quite forgetful.  I am most likely the queen of forgetfulness.  In fact, I often joke with my students about my slippery mind.  Sometimes being forgetful can serve us well.  Other times it is something that can cause us to fall.

This past week (well past couple of weeks) have been some the most emotionally and physically exhausting days of my  life.  My faith in my Lord and in people has been tested.  I have found myself literally crying out...shouting out...begging for God to help!  My face and eyes have stayed red and puffy from crying.  I have felt physically ill from the emotional distress.  At one point, I questioned whether God even heard my pleas.  I knew in my head that He did, but at that moment my heart felt alone and deserted.  During these past weeks, I have spent as much time as possible reading scripture, listening to worship music, praying, seeking counsel from godly friends.  While all that helped for brief moments, I still felt like I was in a desert all by myself.  So what was the problem?

Have you ever been completely ready to leave the house, get out to car, and THEN realize you forgot your keys in the house?  Or maybe you are cleaning your house and you head into a room to get something and all of the sudden you have no idea what you went in that room for in the first place?  Possibly, you are like my mother-in-law who left church one Sunday (like completely left) and then realized she was short one kid?  (I don't think I've ever forgotten one of my kids anywhere, but don't hold me to that.  After all, I very well could have just forgotten that I did it.)

What do all those instances have in common?

In all those cases, you had to GO BACK!  You can't get anywhere without your keys, so you GO BACK to get them.  You can't remember what you needed, so you GO BACK to the room where you thought of it in the first place.  It is frowned upon to forget your child somewhere, so you have to GO BACK to get him.

This morning, in the stillness of the quiet house, God reminded me that I have forgotten some very important things and that I need to GO BACK and get them.

First, I had forgotten that I am the daughter of the ONE True KING!  The King who NEVER forgets me.  The Lord who will NEVER leave me or forsake me.  I had to GO BACK and be reminded that "He Himself has said, “I will never desert, nor will I ever forsake " in Hebrews.  I had to go back and get my identity!  I am not the wife who is too tired to get up and fix her husband's breakfast or the mom who is so emotionally spent that she didn't make it to her son's concert or the teacher who is at the end of her rope because she doesn't know how to reach a suffering student.  While all that is true of how I have felt these last few days, it is not the TRUTH about who I am.  I am a child of God and THAT is where I should find and rest in my identity.  

I also need to GO BACK to the things I know.  We sometimes get so caught up in being the best and learning new ways of doing things that we forget that the "old" ways worked!  Yes, there are some great new ideas out there about running your home or about connecting with students, but sometimes we just need to lay those aside and go back to the ways that have worked for us in the past.  I know that the house will run more smoothly if all of us that live here work together and do a little each day.  I know that my students are much more likely to learn in they are enjoying the act of learning.  I know that my relationship with my husband is the most peaceful and the most passionate when we are intentional about dating each other.  I have to GO BACK to what I know works...even if it isn't what others say "should" be happening.

Finally, there are times that forgetting is good.  I realize when we're wronged, it is difficult to 'forget' and most likely we won't ever truly forget.  However, when we couple that forgetting with forgiving it goes much farther than trying to forget about it without forgiving.  So often in life, people don't even realize how they hurt us.  Maybe it is something they say or something they do.  Maybe it is something they DON'T say or something they DON'T do.  The truth is that we are called to forgive anyway.  Jesus said in Matthew 6, "¹⁴ For if you forgive others for their transgressions, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. ¹⁵ But if you do not forgive others, then your Father will not forgive your transgressions. (Emphasis added)  Oh Lord, thank you for this reminder.  I'm commanded to forgive.  It says nothing about whether they ask for forgiveness or not.  I'm supposed to forgive!  If I live with a spirit of unforgiveness or revenge, then why should I expect my Creator to forgive me for the multitude of sins I commit daily?

So the challenge is to GO BACK!  We will always forget, but the one thing we need to remember is to GO BACK to the TRUTH of who we are in Christ and the truth of what we know works.  Will we be able to do this perfectly?  Nope!  But to borrow a phrase from Lysa Terkeurst, we can make "imperfect progress" by striving each day to do better.



Blessings,
Cindy

For these boys I prayed

Depending on where you are in the world, today or tomorrow is Blake and Cody's birthday.  If you don't know the story of how God blessed us with our family, it's one of my favorite to brag on the faithfulness of God!

This is a story that begins even before Dougie and I got married almost 24 years ago.  I had always wanted a lot of children.  When we got married, we waited for children so that I could finish my degree.  However, we both agreed that a large family would be great!  I prayed and prayed for God to give us many children.  I also prayed OFTEN for Him to give us twins!  Yes...I prayed for twins...regularly!

In the fall of 1991, we learned that God was blessing us with our first child.  We didn't know and didn't want to know if our blessing would be a boy or girl.  We were simply thankful to be given this amazing gift.  It wasn't twins, but we couldn't have been any more excited!  A couple of weeks later, my sister, Becky found out that she was expecting, too...

and...

wait for it...

she was having twins!

Have you ever had that moment when you let disappointment and jealousy over someone else getting what you prayed for rule your life?  Oh, I was happy for her!  And please don't misunderstand me...I was thrilled to be blessed with one baby!  However, I questioned God.  Why would he give HER twins when I was the one that longed for them?!  Why had he not answered my pleas?

Nine months later (well there about), Brooke was born on June 9.  Oh what a jewel!  She was (and still is) the prettiest baby ever.  She filled me with more joy than I could have imagined!  Nine days later, Becky had Austin and Alex.  Truly, all of them are miracles!  How can anyone look at a baby and not believe in miracles?!

At the time, we lived in a tiny apartment behind my parents and Becky and her family lived next door to them.  When the boys were able to come home, Becky and I spent our days at one or the other house taking care of three babies.  I still smile to think about all three of them lined up in the floor of our little living room or propped up in the recliner at her house so we could take MORE pictures!  Brooke was a big baby.  They were tiny!  It made for some great pictures!  Man...taking care of three babies was hard, exhausting work!

God never took away my desire to have twins.  However, let's just say that I didn't pray for twins quite as often! ;)

Fast forward to the fall of 1993.  It was November.  I had just found out about a week earlier that we were pregnant again.  We were so excited.  Lots of things were happening in our lives.  Brooke was a wonderful little toddler!  We were getting ready to build our house.  And now, another baby!

The morning Doug and a family friend was due to dig the foundation of our house, I woke up not feeling well at all.  Not only was I feeling worse than I had in the week before (my body has always told me almost immediately when I'm pregnant), but there were other signs and symptoms that something was wrong. 

I called my doctor, and he wanted me to come in for an ultrasound.  A close friend agreed to take me to the appointment.  As she drove, she prayed for me.  As she drove, I prayed.  Please God, don't take this baby from us! 

As I said, I was very early along.  The ultrasound tech had to do an internal ultrasound in order to see anything.  She kept the screen where I couldn't see it.  At one point, she looked very perplexed.  She looked at me and I could feel myself hold my breath.  I could tell she had seen something on the screen that she didn't expect.  But what?  Oh please God don't take this baby from us!

Then came her question...

"Is there a history of multiple births in your family?"

(A much later ultrasound.)

WHAT?  Did you say MULTIPLE?  Well, yes.  My sister has twins.  Doug's family is full of twins!  Yes, there is a history!

She turned the screen to me.  All that was on it were two itty bitty flashes.  She said, "You're having twins!"  WHAT?  Oh my!  Deep breath!  Really?  Are you sure?  She assured me that those itty bitty flashes were two little hearts!  Wow!  I was speechless!  Then...

OH MY WORD!  We have to change the house!  Wait...Dougie doesn't even know yet.  You know that's not really something I wanted to tell him on the phone. 

As we pulled into the lot where they were digging the foundation, I could see them already digging.  Dougie came over to the car.  I handed him pictures and told him we were going to have TWO BABIES!  (He turned a pale greenish color at first!)  The digging stopped.  The plans were changed.  And our life has never been the same!

Now, our twins, Blake and Cody, have just graduated from high school and are headed to college.  If you were wondering why I started the post with the statement "depending on where you are in the world", it's because currently Blake is serving in the Philippines at Gentile Hands orphanage being the hands and feet of our Lord.  That means for the first time ever, Blake and Cody will celebrate their 18th birthday tomorrow apart. 

It has caused me to think on lots of things.  But mostly, it has just been a reminder of God's faithfulness in our family's life.  I prayed for these boys long before they were ever born, but GOD knew His plans for them even before time began!  As I've prayed for them (as I pray for all four of our children) over the years, God has been gracious and merciful to them and to us.  He has protected them from things that should have killed them.  He has healed their bodies.  But most of all, He has saved their souls.  They are young men on fire for the Lord!  Blake has plans to serve somewhere in the foreign mission field.  Cody has plans to serve as a pastor.  While they have plans, the thing that speaks most to my heart is that they long to be obedient to the call God places on their lives.

For now, this momma that prayed so regularly for twins will continue to pray for our twins as they follow God's directions for their lives!

Happy Birthday, Blake and Cody!  I love you both!




Blessings,
Cindy

Hawaiian Chicken

I apologize up front that there are no pictures of this wonderful dish.  My boys devoured it up before I even thought about getting out my camera.  Oh well!  I love when they fully enjoy what I cook for them.

What You Need:
3-6 large chicken breasts, boneless and skinless
1 bottle hickory barbecue sauce
1 can crushed pineapple
1 can pineapple chunks, drained
1 small can mandarin oranges, mostly drained
1 bag frozen peppers and onions mixture
1/4-1/2 tsp. ground ginger
1/2-1 c. dark brown sugar
salt and pepper

What You Do:
Mix barbecue sauce, crushed pineapple, pineapple chunks, oranges, peppers, onions, ginger and sugar.  Pour a think layer into bottom of crock pot.  Generously salt and pepper both sides of each chicken breast.  Place on top of barbecue sauce layer.  Pour the rest of the barbecue mixture over the chicken.  Cook in crock pot on Low for about 4-5 hours.  (Cooking time will vary depending on your crock pot.)
Shred or cut chicken into chunks.  Stir chicken and sauce together.  Serve over your choice of rice.  We used teriyaki rice.

Blessings,
Cindy

Beef Tamale Bake

What you need:

BASE:
1 box corn muffin mix
1 can cream style corn
1 can mexi-corn
1/3 c. milk
1/3 c. Mexican Shredded Cheese (I used Kraft's with Philly Cream Cheese in it.)
1 egg, slightly beaten
1 tsp. ground cumin
1/8 tsp. cayenne pepper

Sour cream, optional for topping

TOPPINGS:
1 jar enchilada sauce
1-3 pounds of ground beef (I used 2 lbs, but you could easily adapt for more or less), browned with 1 chopped onion, salt, pepper, cumin, and coriander
1 c. Mexican Shredded Cheese

What to do:

Preheat oven to 400 degrees.

Mix the ingredients for the base.  Pour into a greased 9x13 oven-safe dish.  Bake for 20-30 minutes until set.  Remove from oven and poke holes all over with a fork.

Pour enchilada sauce over base and spread around to make sure some goes into the holes you made.  Add ground beef mixture.  Sprinkle with cheese.

Bake for 20 more minutes. 

It was a huge hit with my husband, Doug!  He told me several times how great it was.  I also thought it was quite delicious.

Enjoy!  Let me know if you try it.

Blessings,
Cindy

Cody (Part 3)

If you haven't read Part 1 go here first.  Part 2 is here.

As you can tell from the previous posts, God has definitely had His hand on Cody even before birth!  Truly, God had chosen Cody even before the foundations of the earth to use for His glory!  You would think that the stories previously told would be enough.  But God had other plans for Cody and still does!

About a year ago, Cody came to me after youth group one Wednesday night and told me that he had been saved.  This was a little bit of a shock for me because I truly had believed he had been saved as a young child.  Looking back I realize that was just a Momma wanting to believe her son was saved.  (There's a story here about our other boys, too.  That will have to wait for another time.)  He poured out his heart to me.  God was speaking to Cody in big ways, yet quiet ways.  This time, it wasn't a wish or a hope.  This time Cody was a different young man!  He changed who he spent most of his time with.  He changed his attitude.  He changed how he approached situations.  Well, let's be real here...God changed these things in Cody!  Cody was living to serve his Savior! 

During the summer of last year, our church held its annual Jeru missions focus where we do different types of community projects and block parties...missions right in our backyard!  I happened to be in school training during that week.  I knew all 3 boys were working on Jeru projects.  They were all passionate about participating.  As I sat in a training class at my school, my phone buzzed.  I looked and saw that it was Doug and knew that he wouldn't call unless something was wrong.  His voice sounded shaky.  He went on to tell me that Cody had been hit across the face with a shovel during some landscaping work.  Okay...pause here.  A shovel across the face...I don't know about the images that popped into your mind, but the images I saw that day in my head were horrific! 

Doug told me that Cody was on his way to the ER with the youth minister.  I told him I'd be right there.  Oh wait...my car was at my dear friend's house where Brooke was babysitting for the most amazing baby ever!  (I'm a little partial to the sweet boy!)  Jayne (mom of the sweetest baby) came out to check on me and we both left in a hurry to take me to get my car.  We prayed on the way.  I prayed all the way to the ER. 

The shovel had gone right across Cody's nose...right between his eyes!  However, it was a cut that only needed a few stitches.  His nose was not broken.  His eyes were fine!  He didn't have a concusion!  Once again, God had protected him.  That is just exactly the message Cody shared!  (After a little teasing of his cousin/friend who had whopped him across the face with the shovel.)  Cody went right back to the missions projects as soon as he left the ER.

Enough?  You would think!  However, just a few weeks ago, God once again displayed his mighty power in Cody's life.  We were home on a cold night.  Cody was in our bedroom with us talking about how bored he was.  (Famous last words.)  Doug suggested to Cody to go out and start burning the brush pile where Doug had been cleaning out our creek.  Within minutes...

BOOM!

The explosion we heard was so loud it sounded like someone standing in the room with us and shooting a gun.  Our house shook from that boom!  I yelled to Dougie that it had to be Cody!  I ran from my bedroom to our kitchen and Cody was already (within seconds) walking in through the back door.  Understand, our back door was quite some distance from where the fire was.  He was dazed and weak!  I got him on the ground to keep him from fainting.  Took his coat off him to see how badly burned he was.  His hair was black from being singed, as were his eyebrows and the rest of his facial hair.  His hand was badly burned and we could already see where blisters were forming.  When he coughed, we could smell smoke and...gasoline!  Yep...he had accidentally used gas instead of kerosene. 

He kept saying he would be fine.  He wanted to take a shower to get the burned hair off of him.  The smell of gas coming out when he coughed was most concerning to me along with his hand.  When he got out of the shower, his hand was hurting pretty bad and the corner of his eye was tender.  The smell of the burned hair and flesh still hung heavy in the air.  We headed for the ER.

When we arrived at the hospital, they immediately took him back to assess the burns and any other injuries.  Miraculously, let me repeat that...MIRACULOUSLY Cody's lungs were completely clear!  COMPLETELY CLEAR!  The burn around his eye was already feeling better.  However, his hand was hurting horribly.  They dressed the burn, gave him something for pain, and cleared him of all other injuries!  Praise the Lord! 

Yet again, God had protected Cody from what could have meant severe burns all over his body or even his death!  By the very next day, Cody's hand was already healing.  He didn't need pain medicine after that morning. 

Last summer God called Cody to full-time ministry!  While he is unsure of the exacts of it all, he is sure God has a plan for him to reach people with the Gospel!  I don't know what God's plans are.  But one thing I know for sure...



(One of Cody's senior pictures...taken by the VERY talented Rebekah Travis)



God has had his hand on Cody since before time.  He has protected him over and over from injury and death.  I'm looking forward to seeing all that God has in store for our Baby B--Cody!

How then will they call on Him in whom they have not believed? How will they believe in Him whom they have not heard? And how will they hear without a preacher?     Romans 10:14

Blessings,

Cindy

Our MIracle Son (One of them anyway) Part 2

If you haven't read part 1, please go here first to read about the miraculous beginning of Cody's life.

Cody was an energetic, loving toddler!  He adored the Lion King and Spider Man.  He carried a little Simba action figure with him everywhere he went.  EVERYWHERE!  When he liked something you knew it!  When he didn't like something, you knew that, too!  He hated getting his hair cut and having his nails clipped.  He would scream to the top of his lungs, "IT HURTS!!!  MOMMY, IT HURTS!"  No amount of consoling would change his feelings on the matter, either.  He was a passionate child.

Fast forward to the spring semester of first grade.  At this time, Blake and Cody were 6.  (Dale was 5.  That means Brooke was 8.)  Needless to say, our house was always buzzing. 

We live out in the country on ten acres with a wonderful creek that meanders around our property.  There are lots of trees!  There are many things for young boys to get into.  Our boys were climbing trees by the time they could walk...or at least it seemed that way.

It was the week of Spring Break.  At the time, I worked for a private preschool that was on the same schedule as the public schools.  We were all home for Spring Break.  This particular day (the Monday of break) was a beautiful day...perfect temperature, sun shining.  It was a great day for the kids to be outside playing.  The boys often roamed around behind our house while we would go in and out to check on them.

Late that afternoon, one of the boys (I don't remember if it was Blake or Dale) came running into the house and said that Cody had fallen out of a tree.  We raced out the back door and Cody was limping toward the back deck.  Just the relief that he was up and walking flooded over us.  However, when we got him in the house he couldn't breathe and was crying because he was hurting.  He couldn't tell us exactly how he was hurting.  He knew his foot hurt, but he basically was hurting all over. 

My parents rushed up to our house.  I was trying to soothe Cody and at the same time telling Doug that we needed to go to the hospital.  Doug (being the man that he is) said something like, "Oh, he'll be alright!  After all, he walked to the house."  Doug went outside to see where he fell.  When he came back in he told us that Cody had fallen 12 feet out of the tree and another 6 feet into the creekbed.  My tiny little boy had fallen 18 feet!  My mother and I had decided we would go to the hospital with or without Doug.  It ended up that Doug and I took him to Kosair hospital and my parents stayed with our other children.

The staff at Kosair immediately took him to a trauma room.  They ran x-ray after x-ray after x-ray.  He had broken his foot right at the growth plate.  He would have to put no weight on it for some time.  At that point, we were once again relieved and thankful that his injury, while serious, was so much less than it could have been.  The doctors decided that Cody should stay overnight for observation. 

That night, Cody would cry out in extreme pain everytime he moved.  Something wasn't right and this Momma knew it!  It really makes no sense that I thought something else was wrong when the doctors were saying there wasn't anything else.  After all, Cody was going to hurt; he had fallen hard and a long distance.  The only explanation is that God prompted me to know something more was wrong.  I pestered and complained to the attending physician until he finally relented and said they would do a scan of Cody's spine from top to bottom.  He said to me, "I'm only doing this to prove to you that nothing is wrong."  I said, "Great!  I hope you are right!"  Grrrr!  That still gets under my skin when I think about it.  Anyway, I digress.

Becky, my sister had come to visit Cody and told Doug and me to go get something to eat.  We went downstairs to McD's and came right back to Cody's room.  We weren't gone 20 minutes.  Becky met us at the door and told us that the doctor had come in and told her that Cody had to lay flat on his back and couldn't move.  The scan showed that he had broken his back.  I can't even type this without crying.  A broken back?!  What would that mean?  What will they need to do?  How can we control his pain?  If he moves, will he end up being paralyzed?  Oh so many questions. 

Of course, we were praying through all this, but the urgency became even more intense.  Cody had to lay flat on his back for several days in that hospital bed until they could make a custom turtle-style back brace.  He had so many prayer warriors interceding for him.

We spent a full week at Kosair's.  Cody would come home in the back brace, wheelchair, and a walker.  He could not get up at all without the brace.  He could not put any weight on his foot so he had to be in the wheelchair.  The walker was for moving small distances around the house.  We moved his bed into the living room to care for him 24/7.  Cody finished his first grade year home-bound.  He spent from April through the end of July in the brace and the wheelchair.

It wasn't until we were past the initial shock of his injuries that we realized how God had protected him the day he fell from the tree.  Cody probably didn't weigh 35 pounds at the time.  (Our boys have always been tiny.  That is until they started getting taller and taller.)  He fell 18 feet into a rocky creekbed hitting branches on his way down.  He walked to the house on a broken foot and with a broken back.  BUT GOD protected him!  Cody could have just as easily been killed that day.  Beyond the initial fall, Cody could have been paralyzed because of a delay in the diagnosis of the broken back.  BUT GOD had other plans for Cody.

For He will give His angels charge concerning you,
To guard you in all your ways.

Psalm 91:11 

Part 3--coming soon.

Blessings,

Cindy

Our Miracle Son (one of them anyway)--Part 1

The events of this past week have found me pondering on the life of our 'middle' son.  Really, Cody shares the first son position with his twin brother.  It just happens that Cody was born 2 minutes after Blake, thus the middle son title.  As I thought about Cody's life...from the time in my womb until now at almost 18 years old, I realized more than ever that God's hand has been upon him in mighty ways and know that God has wonderful plans for his future.  Let's back up to the winter of 1993 or a little before.

I had always wanted twins and had prayed and prayed that God would bless me with twins!  When I was pregnant with our daughter in the winter of 1991-92, my sister was also pregnant.  I knew I was having 1 precious baby and I was so thankful!  Then, my sister found out that she was having twins!  While it didn't decrease my thankfulness for our baby on the way, I must admit that my heart sank!  I thought some not-so-nice thoughts.  After all, I HAD PRAYED FOR TWINS!  I wanted twins.  I really thought she got pregnant just because I was pregnant!  (Yes--I'm the spoiled baby of our family!)  Oh my, the battle that waged within me about the twins!  Once our beautiful babies were born, I helped daily with Alex and Austin, while we also cared for Brooke.  Those were some difficult but amazing days!

Fast forward two years to the winter of 1993...November to be exact so really the fall, I suppose.  I had recently found out that I was pregant again!  What a blessing!  We always knew we wanted a large family.  Doug and I were so excited!  So much was going on in our lives at the time.  We had bought land several years earlier and the time had come to start building our house.  The night before the foundation was to be dug, I started bleeding.  I was devastated even before knowing what was causing it.  I worried and fretted all night.  I called the doctor and he told me to wait until the morning and see what happened and then go straight to his office.  We already had plans for Dougie and a family friend to start digging for the foundation, so he couldn't go with me.  A dear friend from church said she would go with me.  We waited and she was such an encouragement and comfort.  At this point, I was only a few weeks pregnant.  (I always knew almost at conception.  I was blessed with morning, mid-morning, noon, afternoon, evening, night, and even middle of the night sickness!) 


The doctor had decided to go ahead and do an ultrasound to see what was going on.  The technician doing the ultrasound was so sweet.  She started the procedure and turned the screen to look at it closely.  This scared me to death!  Then, she looked at me with a perplexed expression.  She turned the screen to me and asked..."Is there a history of multiple births in your or your husband's family?"  By this time, my friend's eyes were as big as saucers!  I said,  "Actually, yes.  My sister just had twins about 1 1/2 years ago."  The technician went on to point out two teeny tiny blips on the screen.  I was so early on that all that was visible were two amazing beautiful, awe-inspiring, blips on the screen.  There were TWO heartbeats!  I WAS EXPECTING TWINS! 

We rushed to the property where Doug was working and shared the news!  He turned as pale as a person can turn.  I thought he might pass out!  Then, the digging of the foundation stopped!  We needed to add more room.  :)  Isn't God's timing perfect?!

Fast forward a few months into the pregnancy.  Expecting twins in 1994 meant that I was privileged to have multiple ultrasounds unlike with Brooke when I had only 1.   During an ultrasound appointment, the technician abruptly left the room.  When she came back, she had a doctor with her.  Once again, my heart sank!  The doctor explained to me that Baby B (Cody) had something wrong with one of his kidneys.  He explained that I needed to follow-up with my OB/GYN and also consult with our pediatrician.  He then went on to strongly suggest that after those consultations, we come back to the hospital to have selective reduction counseling because of all that the kidney 'malformation' could mean. 

ARE YOU KIDDING ME?  YOU WANT ME TO CHOOSE TO REDUCE MY TWINS TO ONE?  YOU WANT ME TO CHOOSE TO END THE LIFE OF THIS BABY THAT I HAD PRAYED ABOUT FOR SO LONG?



(Ultrasound later in pregnancy...2 heads)

Well, I did talk to my OB/GYN and told him point blank that the only choice to be made is leaving this baby in my God's hands and trusting that God has a plan for him!  Thankfully, my doctor completely agreed!

We continued through the pregnancy, having ultrasound after ultrasound.  Each time, the kidney problem seemed to either stay the same or be a little worse.  Doug and I took the concern to our church family at the time.  Our church family prayed over my sons, even while I was pregnant.  When Blake and Cody were born, they immediately started doing tests on Cody's kidneys and other things, as well.  Both babies seemed perfectly healthy, except Cody's kidney still wasn't quite developed the way they said it should be.  All those "birth defects" the doctors were concerned about...NONE!





(Cody on left; Blake on right)

Again, we took our concerns to our church family.  This time, the church prayed over Cody.  I still get chills when I remember that day.  God's power that flowed through those believers was overwhelming!  At Cody's next check-up, his kidney showed no signs of any malformation!

These were the first things God did for Cody.  Psalms 139:13 says, "For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother’s womb."  God was at work in the life of Cody even before time began.  God also had big plans for Cody as he grew.

Part 2 coming soon.

Strong?

Over the last 2 weeks, in the midst of the hectic life around me during this time of the year, I've had the time to relax by browsing on Pinterest or by catching up with people via facebook.  As we near the new year, I'm noticing a shift in posts and in conversations.  While this shift to new things and resolutions can be a good thing, I have been broken by some of what I've read.

Things like...

You were given this in life because you are

strong enough to handle it.

Live strong in 2012.

God will never give me something I can't handle.

None of those things are wrong...exactly.  But each one of them and many more like them lack one truth.  You see the emphasis in these things is on the Me/Myself/I.  The focus is on what I can do or what YOU can do.

Have you ever stopped to think about this?  I have been...lately especially!  Our family, church family, and friends have all endured many hardships over the last year. 

• We've seen loved ones die suddenly.
• We've experienced dire financial circumstances.
• We've watched dear friends pack up and move away knowing we will most likely never see them again in this life.
• We've watched children make devastating choices.
• We've watched children make amazing choices...but those choices will affect our family's life forever.
• We've dealt with illness, injuries, and the pain that comes from those.
• We've experienced unfairness at work or at school.
• We've walked with our children through unimaginable heartbreak.

Really, I could go on and on!  This morning while catching up on facebook, God kept impressing on me the FACT that I cannot ever be strong enough.  Many of things my personal family has been through this year and in years past would have left us paralyzed if we had had to be strong enough to deal with them.

PRAISE GOD we didn't have to be strong enough!

You see God tells us in His Word over and over that HE IS OUR STRENGTH!

Deuteronomy 31:6  Be strong and courageous, do not be afraid or tremble at them, for the LORD your God is the one who goes with you. He will not fail you or forsake you.

Joshua 1:9  Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous! Do not tremble or be dismayed, for the LORD your God is with you wherever you go.

Psalm 18:2  The LORD is my rock and my fortress and my deliverer, My God, my rock, in whom I take refuge; My shield and the horn of my salvation, my stronghold.

2 Corinthians 12:9  But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me.

Philippians 4:13  I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength.

While we are commanded over and over again throughout the Bible to "Be strong.", that strength always comes from the Lord.  I'm so thankful that He is my portion and my strength, and that although He calls me to be strong...to hold on...to have courage, He ALWAYS supplies the strength for me to do those things.

My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever.  Psalm 73:26

A current song on Christian radio is a great reminder of the truth that we don't have to be strong enough.  God is strong enough for both of us!  Strong Enough by Matthew West

Blessings,
Cindy

Even in the valley...

GOD IS GOOD!

Have you ever wondered why you or your family has to go through hard times...sickness...violence...times of many tears and many questions?  While I'm not focusing on the why's of our challenges, there have been times this last week that I just stopped and cried out to God because I just don't understand.

I don't understand why Brooke has become sick again with what appears to be issues with her heart after many years without any complications.  I don't understand why my migraines had reappeared full force.  I don't understand why Dougie is struggling at work in so many ways.  I really don't understand why God allowed Blake to be attacked in a parking lot by a complete stranger.  I don't understand!

Then, in my quiet time, God speaks through His Word to me...words of comfort, assurance, and love.  As I'm listening to one of my favorite bands this week, God speaks to me through their lyrics.  At just the right time and just the right place, God sent just the right people to minister to my family and to me.  It was through all this that I realized I don't have to understand why.  What I have to understand is that even in the valley, God is good!  He is working all things for the good of His children.  No matter what, we're called to praise Him.  No matter what we are called to live out our lives for Him.

So, what do I have to praise God for when I have one child sick and one child hurt?  Let me share with you.

I am married to a wonderful, Christian man who loves and supports us through good times and bad!  Dougie is a true blessing!

Protection for Brooke!

Blake's injuries are minor compared to what they could have been!

I have a group of prayer warrior sisters in Christ praying for me daily!

I had 3 days without migraines this week!

Marsha was near to minister to Brooke's needs when I wasn't there!

Marsha opened up her home to Brooke!

Texts, facebook messages and phone calls from sisters in Christ to encourage and let me know they are praying for Brooke.

A fellow teacher...actually 3...offering their time to cover my class so I could get to Brooke!

A parent of a student and fellow teacher offering to take my class an extra 50 minutes on her planning so I could catch up!

God intervening and stopping the attack on Blake!

Cody and Dale reacting exactly the way God wanted them to react!

A police officer being on the scene quickly!

My boys' witness stands firm because they stood firm in the Lord!

A mom of my boys' friend driving by and stopping to help!

Witnessing Blake's quick forgiveness!

Being able to pray with Blake in the hospital!

Clear catscan of his brain and face!

The boys' good friends!

Through everything this week, having opportunities to share how the Lord has worked with people who aren't yet Christ followers!

A phone call from Cathy at the exact right time when I needed it most!

Psalm 27!

A visit from Blake's friend bringing him a card full of hugs!

I'm sure I've left something out.  You get the point, right?  Satan has been attacking our family! 

BUT GOD!

God knows.  He cares.  He is in control.  He is and will continue to work all things to our good.

I appreciate and am so thankful for everyone's prayers!  Thank you from the bottom of my heart!

Blessings,

Cindy



Gain the world and lose my soul

³⁵ For ^(A)whoever wishes to save his ^[a]life will lose it, but whoever loses his ^[b]life for My sake and the gospel’s will save it. ³⁶ For what does it profit a man to gain the whole world, and forfeit his soul? ³⁷ For what will a man give in exchange for his soul?  Mark 8:35-37

I love early morning wake-up calls.  No, I'm not crazy (well maybe a little), but I'm not talking about the early wake-up calls of an alarm.  I'm talking about those times when God wakes me in the wee hours of the morning, long before most people are up...long before I had planned to get up...even long before the sun comes up.  Some time back a dear Christian woman helped me see that those early morning nudges when you really should be sleeping are times when God is calling you to spend time with Him...in prayer and in His Word!

This morning around 4:30, I was all the sudden awake.  I had not been dreaming that I remember.  There hadn't been any noises to wake me.  I was simply awake.  During the hour that followed, God placed so many of my friends and family on my heart. 

Friends and family who are facing illness and eminent death of loved ones.

Friends who are agreeing in prayer for an injured young man in Colorado.

Friends who are praying their children home from orphanges all over the world.

Friends who are caring for children who aren't their own, but love them dearly anyway!

Children called to ministry!

Moms and Dads of children called to ministry.

Teachers planning for the upcoming year.

Students who will be placed in the care of those teachers.

Friends and family who are awaiting word on new jobs.

Friends and family praying for God's guidance in choosing a home.

Friends who are struggling with who God really is.

Friends who are longing for a time past when life seemed to be good for them.

Friends and family who seem to have a longing for God in their lives but are still living in the world.

Friends and family who can't see that what they need...all they need...is the Lord in their lives.

So much flooding my mind that the only thing to do was pray.  As much as I had to pray about, there was one 'theme' that kept coming back to me.  The heaviest burden was for friends who are searching--for peace, for comfort, for love, for answers.  God kept bringing these people back to the top of my list.

After much time just sitting with God in the darkness and silence, I got up and went for my Bible.  Since Sunday's Sunday School lesson and memory verse, God has placed on my mind the idea of living for Him versus living for the world.  It seems that everywhere I turn, I'm faced with the images and words of people struggling with this.  As I searched through my Bible, I found many passages addressing living for Christ instead of living for the world.  Then, a image came to mind that has stuck there this morning.

Yep, that's a fence!  As I thought about this image of a fence, I thought about how many times in my life I straddled the fence--one leg on God's side, one leg on the world's side.  I remember trying with all I had to live both ways.  But it simply wasn't possible.  I am either for God or against God.  There is no middle ground or room to play with the setup.  As Christians, we either are or aren't!  As I pondered more on this thought, I thought of areas in my life where this has been a struggle.  I thought of areas where my friends are struggling right now as I type and as you read.  So many of us have faced, are facing, or will face choices that will define which side of the fence we are on.  We have to ask ourselves...I have to ask myself...who or what are we living for.

When I'm on FaceBook, do I try to sit on both sides...posting nice scriptural things one hour and then derogatory things the next?

At work, do I try to sit on both sides...praying with coworkers over a need one day and gossiping the next?

At home, do I try to sit on both sides...encouraging children to keep garbage out of their lives in the morning and then watching a TV show that goes against that encouragement that night?

The list could go on and on. 

Today, my prayer is that I will always choose God's side.  My prayer is that my friends who are struggling with where they belong find the One true God and live for Him.  My prayer is that God will convict when we stray.  My prayer is that He will call those searching for peace and comfort to Himself.

¹⁵ Do not love ^(A)the world nor the things in the world. ^(B)If anyone loves the world, the love of the Father is not in him. ¹⁶ For all that is in the world, ^(C)the lust of the flesh and ^(D)the lust of the eyes and ^(E)the boastful pride of life, is not from the Father, but is from the world. ^{17 (F)}The world is passing away, and also its lusts; but the one who ^(G)does the will of God lives forever.  1 John 2:15-17

Thankful for early morning wake-ups,

Cindy

Delicious Dinner!

I had time to do some experimenting in the kitchen this afternoon.  Dinner was delicious!  We had an Apple Bacon Meatloaf, Green Beans, and Mashed Cauliflower.  Everyone loved the new meatloaf recipe AND the mashed cauliflower.  At first, there was a little hesitation with the cauliflower, but the taste won everyone over. 

Apple Bacon Meatloaf

1 1/2 to 2 pounds lean ground beef
1/2 to 1 pound Italian Sausage
2 Eggs
1 c. bread crumbs or crushed herb stuffing crumbs
1 medium Sweet Onion, chopped
1 Gala or Fuji Apple, chopped
6 pieces Cooked Bacon, chopped
6 pieces Uncooked Bacon
1 c. Apple Butter (separated 1/2 c. for meatloaf and 1/2 c. for glaze)
1/2 c. Cinnamon Apple Sauce
6 Tbs. Hickory Barbecue Sauce (3 for meatloaf and 3 for glaze)
Salt and Pepper

Preheat oven to 400 degrees.  Grease 2 loaf pans.  Line the bottom of each loaf pan with bread slices.  (This will soak up any grease from the cooking meatloaf.)  Set aside.  Combine meats, eggs, bread crumbs, onion, apple, chopped bacon, apple butter, apple sauce, and barbecue sauce using your hands to mix thoroughly.  Salt and pepper to your liking.  Mix thoroughly.  Separate and put into loaf pans.  Mix the rest of the apple butter and barbecue sauce to make glaze.  Spread over top of meatloaf mixture.  Place 3 slices of uncooked bacon on each loaf.  Bake at 400 degrees for 45 minutes to an hour until cooked through.  Switch oven to broil setting.  Broil for 10 minutes or until bacon on top is crisp.  Let meatloaf rest before moving to serving plate.  (Remember, the bread is not for eating.  It is soaked with grease.  Just discard.)

Mashed Cauliflower

1 head cauliflower, cut into florets
4 c. chicken stock or broth
1/2 container Philly Garlic Cooking Cream
1/2 stick butter
Salt and Pepper
Chives for garnish

Place cauliflower florets in a large pot.  Cover with chicken stock.  Cover and bring to a boil.  Then, leave covered and simmer on medium heat for 10 minutes.  Uncover and bring heat back up to medium high.  Cook for about 10 more minutes.  Drain.  Add cooking cream, butter, salt and pepper.  Mix with a hand mixer until desired consistency for your taste.  Move to a serving bowl.  Garnish with a pat of butter and chives.

Enjoy!
Cindy

Cindy ♥ Doug, A Marraige Made in Heaven

I've been promising a post about marriage for sometime.  Since I've been thinking A LOT about Doug this week with him working out of town, I thought now would be a good time to go ahead with it.  First, let me say up front, I'm not an expert on marriage, but I am experienced. :)  Doug and I have been married for 22 years.  We have experienced the wonderful seasons where we were on top of the world taking in the views from the highest mountain peaks.  We have also experienced the lowest valleys we could have experienced in a marraige and still came out with the rings on our fingers and the promise in our hearts.  So while I'm not an expert and will never claim to be, I have lived a gamut of experiences in my married life.

♥ Our story ♥

I never tire of telling our love story for it truly is a story of a marriage made in heaven by our One True God.  Doug and I met at church when we were in early elementary school.  I was in first grade.  He was in second grade.  By fourth and fifth grade, we were 'going together' and holding hands under the hymnal or church Bible.  (I don't advocate that for children. :)  However, it truly was innocent.)  We were best of friends.  We talked all the time.  We liked spending time together.  Our sisters were friends.  Our parents were friends.  We went to the same church.  We went to the same school.  We lived down the road from each other.  We rode the same bus.  In other words, we were able to spend a lot of time together.  We knew each other.  If anyone asked me at the early age of 10 or 11 who I was going to marry, I could have instantly told them, "Dougie!"

In middle school, we would 'like' each other off and on.  However, being middle schoolers, we also liked other people, too.  We remained close friends, but we were becoming two very different people.  Then, one awful day in high school I learned that Dougie would be moving to Texas.  I was a freshman, and he was a sophomore at the time.  There was no warning.  They were moving, and there was nothing I could do.  That was a very sad day in my life.

I went on living, of course.  I liked other boys.  I know he liked and dated other girls.  Then, in December on my sixteenth birthday, I was at a BC basketball game with some friends.  One of my best friends came running down the bleachers toward me yelling, "Cindy...Dougie is here.  Doug is looking for you!"  I thought she was just messing with me.  After all, he had moved more than a year before.  Why would he be there? 

I looked up and THERE HE WAS...as handsome as ever...walking toward me.  I'm sure my heart stopped beating for just a moment.  I'm also sure there was a smile as big as Texas on my face.  What a wonderful birthday present!  Well, we dated for about a month and then, he just disappeared.  I tell him often that he was quite the jerk!  I was so hurt!  My heart was completely broken.  I questioned why God had brought him back into my life (which I truly believed then that he had and I still believe NOW that he had) just to rip him out of it.

Again, life went on.  I dated again.  This time with the determination that D.F. would never hurt me again.  I would give my love to someone else.  I enjoyed the rest of my junior year of high school and began my senior year.  I was working at what was then Otto Drugstore. 

One particular day in September I was working the cash register up front and got a phone call from my sister.  She was at Doug's sister's house.  She said that he wanted me to come there when I got off work.  I said, "NO!"  Later, he called.  He was persistent.  I told him that he had hurt me enough and that I would not come there to see him.  If he wanted to see me, he'd have to come to Shepherdsville.  I told him what time I was leaving work.  He was there waiting when I went to my car. :)  That was September 6, 1987.

We went on our first official date that day.  He wonders why I love Mr. Gatti's so much.  That is part of the reason, I would guess.  We sat at Mr. Gatti's for hours that day.  We talked.  He apologized profusely.  We talked some more.  It was that day, sitting in the party room of Mr. Gatti's all by ourselves, with Doug writing sweet stuff on a helium balloon, that I fell head over heals completely in love with him.  Oh, I already loved him, but that day sealed the deal. 

On March 15 of the next year, Doug proposed.  We had plans to wait 5 years to get married.  I would finish college.  He would finish trade school.  However, we knew we could not wait 5 years.  So, we set the date.  August 5, 1989.  I still laugh when I think about it.  We were just being silly thinking we would wait that long.  We had literally been waiting our whole lives for this.  In May, we went to my parents and told them we couldn't wait a year to be married.  After much discussion, it was decided the date would be changed to August 6 of the same year.  There was ONE stipulation.  I couldn't say the word wedding until high school graduation was over.  (I was graduating valedictorian.  My parents were not going to allow anything to get in the way of me finishing what I had started.  I am very thankful for that.)   I graduated in May, and we planned the wedding in less than 2 months.

As I think back over the story of our life up to that point, I smile...I laugh...I even get a bit teary eyed at times.  When I think of how God orchestrated two separate families...two separate lives...so that Doug and I would be placed together for His glory and our good, it amazes me.  You see, none of that story is my doing or Doug's doing.  We couldn't have come up with such an outlandish on again/off again thing if we tried.  I mean, honestly...Doug's family up and moved to TEXAS and then, what I failed to mention above was that while he was visiting friends in Kentucky, his family decided to move back to Kentucky without telling him.  God had to have acted upon my heart to soften it to let Doug back into my life after being hurt.  As humans, we tend to build up scar tissue that isn't easily broken through when we're hurt by someone.  God had to place me on Doug's mind for him to decide he wanted to see me after more than a year of being away.  And to think it all started when we were small children. 

Our lives changed on August 6, 1988.  We were no longer just Cindy and Doug.  We became Mr. and Mrs.!  What a wonderful change!

My insights and thoughts on Christian Marraige:

1.  God has to be first in both of your lives.  This will be evident in so many ways.  Do you go to church together?  Do you pray together?  Do you study or discuss the Word together?  Are you committed to following God's will for your lives?  Are you raising your kids His way?

2.  My husband is second in my life.  I am second in his life.  This is a lesson we want our children to understand completely.  We want them to know that we love them...completely and unconditionally.  However, we want them to know that they cannot come between us a husband and wife.  Kids can be and will be manipulative if you let them be.  Don't allow them to move into the spot where your husband should be.

3.  When you get married, the focus should change from "I" to "WE".  When a couple consistently socializes separately instead of together, trouble is soon to follow.  To get to the point of marriage, what did you do?  You went out together.  Marriage shouldn't change that.  If anything, it should make it better.  The lowest time in our marriage is when we were both going out with friends instead of together.  We invited trouble into our lives by opening a door for Satan to step right into.  Why go to dinner with a friend on a Friday night and leave your spouse at home...especially on a regular basis?  Think about how often you are spending time with other people away from your spouse. 

4.  Friends of the opposite sex is a dangerous and slippery slope to walk.  I'm not talking mutual friends where you and your husband are friends with another couple.  I mean where the wife is friends with another man that her husband is not friends with or vice-versa.  We tend to think that we are super-human and can just be friends and that those friendships will never go where they shouldn't.  I'm here to tell you, friends, that you are lying to yourselves.  Once again, that opens a door for Satan to step right in.

5.  Work to make your marriage the best it can be.  What have you done for your husband today?  What have you done today that says "I love YOU" without using the words?

6.  Learn early to say, "I'm sorry for _____________.  Will you please forgive me?"

7.  Learn how to forgive even when it hurts.

8.  Play together.  Again, what did you do before you got married?  You had fun together.  Why stop?

9.  Hold hands.  :)

10.  View your marriage as a FOREVER promise.  Divorce is not an option.  God is an amazing God that can heal hurts, give peace, calm fears, and in the process SAVE marriages. 

I've often wondered why our story had so many twists and turns before we finally figured out we belonged together.  After 22 years of many highs and some very low lows, I think it's because God knew what we would experience and was preparing us for the times ahead.  He was preparing me for future heartache and for future healing.  He was preparing Dougie for how to be the wonderful godly husband he is today.  God was teaching us about forgiveness and persistence.  You see, God knew that without this we would have given up on our marriage ten years ago.  God knew what we needed, when we needed it.  I'm so thankful for God's provision and protection over our marriage.    How exciting it is to know that my marriage to Dougie is truly God-given, God-ordained, God-orchestrated...absolutely

♥ a marriage made in Heaven! ♥

Blessings,
Cindy